fa la la la la

Tis the season, y'all, and office Christmas party invites abound! Well okay, I have two. But hey, it's one more than I had last year. Plus I'm keeping a space open for a random EC1 party that will doubtless be gatecrashed at some point, just to get into the spirit of things.

First up, the Tribune party this Thursday. Held at a glamourous Westminster winery (okay, the Red Lion), there are sure to be endless trays of mouthwatering canapés and chilled bottles of Veuve Clicquot (no wait, it's a paying bar). But at least Kevin will be there. *sigh*...

Check back here on Friday morning (afternoon, realistically) for the hangover-induced rehash, replete with thinly veiled jabs at the gin-soaked antics of poorly disguised semi-famous people. Much like any other day, really.

Abandon Ship!

Okay, you know it's time to get your ass into gear and look for a new job when...

We published a series of pieces last week discussing the impact on different parts of the world of a second term in office for Bush (yes, us and everyone else, I know). The one on Europe was particularly tragic; badly written, lacking in coherance and missing a lot of key countries (UK and France, anyone?). But despite many a plea from the editorial board to pull the story entirely until it was better written, it was given the go-ahead from the boss. Mainly because he wrote it. Well, some of it.

Today, however, I found out that he eventually did change some of what he wrote. And why? Because he got word from the company that is due to take us over in a few months' time that the piece "was too hard on Bush."

Oh. My. Fucking. Lord.

Working for the man is one thing, but being part of Bush's whitewashing machine is quite another, no matter how small a part in it we may be playing. I'm offski.

tired and emotional

This is just going to be a random collection of post-US-election ramblings, because I'm too bloody tired and emotional to attempt structuring my thoughts.

First up, the question that every right-thinking person should be asking: How the HELL did he do it again? How has Dubya managed to win by an even greater margin this time than he did in 2000? Granted, it's not hard to improve on a margin of zero. But he's won the popular vote this time, and that's what amazes me. And why? Was it over "security issues in the post-9/11 world"? In the days running up to the election, I saw a lot of Americans interviewed on television saying that while Bush made them cringe, they would still be voting for him because he was the best man to protect America from terrorists. .........Let's see, would those be the same terrorists who have been spurred into action by virtually every foreign policy move Bush has ever made, whether in Israel, Afghanistan or Iraq? The mind boggles.

I've been going over it in my mind, trying to find out where exactly Bush had the advantage over Kerry in the eyes of the voters. Political experience? No. Economic success? Hardly. Social policy? Foreign affairs? Don't make me laugh. But what about the elusive "common touch"? Ah, now there's a different story. Sadly, that's probably about the one thing that Bush has got over Kerry. He had it over Al Gore as well. The dashing Bill Clinton had it in spades, which leads me to think that the undecided women voters so key to winning US elections must be largely made up of horny housewives who end up voting for the candidate they have the bigger crush on. Ugh.

Back in London, there was also a strong groupie vibe surrounding the US election. I was down at the ICA near Trafalgar Square, watching the results come in live while raging debates took place in one corner of the bar and Martin Rowson captured the mood of the evening by drawing cartoons of bullets piercing Bush's skull. I say a groupie vibe because even though we arrived at 8.45, the place was so packed out that we had to queue until 10 just to get into the bar. The concept of being all dolled up and waiting for over an hour to watch election results on a giant screen in a noisy bar (punctuated by cheers whenever a state was called for Kerry) was a new one to me, but I'm glad I went. I'm also glad I left when I did, which was at 2am. At that time Kerry still seemed to have a chance of winning,a and I left on a high note. Whereas at 5.30am, when my other flatmates came back after having moved on from the ICA to (eek) the Hard Rock Cafe, which was also having an election shindig, they were quiet, depressed and deflated because Bush was heading for victory.

It's funny. Over the past few weeks I've been glumly resigned to a Bush win, but now that it's actually happened I can't quite believe it. Apparently Democrats voted based on the economy and the war in Iraq, whereas the issues that prompted Republicans to go to the ballot box were terrorism and "moral values". Christ. This is George W. Bush we're talking about, people! Morals do not enter the equation!

So there you have it, Bush is back and we're all going to hell in a handcart. Friends have been e-mailing me, saying "The Americans have really screwed themselves over this time," but the rest of the world will be affected just as much. I know that Americans (or anyone else, for that matter) shouldn't have to vote in accordance with what people from other countries want, but that doesn't change the fact that we're all going to DIE now, even sooner than we thought.